Stop Judging Yourself

Most of the time I talk about health, wellness, fitness, healthy eating, mindset, and so on. It’s what I do.  It’s my job.


Today, however, I’ve got something else burning on my heart.  I’ve learned to just go with whatever is on my heart. Someone needs to hear what’s on my heart today.  So, if you are struggling with judging yourself please keep reading.  If you have completely eradicated that from your life I applaud you (but I have to say, I don’t really believe you….you are human after all).


Today I was at an all day networking and business event. There were many lovely women, some interesting speakers and a guy who can really sing. Yes, a guy who can really sing. Unique for an event of this nature.


One of the last speakers had us do an exercise. The introvert in me always has a brief moment of sweating when they say “exercise” because I always wonder what awkward thing will they ask us to do.


This exercise was towards the TOP of the awkward scale. He asked us to partner up with one other person and face each other. Then he told us to stare at them while he played music (which I am certain I’ve heard at Disneyland – and, no, not the carousel music) and then asked us to notice things about our partner. We did this not once but TWICE. (The introverts out there groaned. I heard you….I’ll groan with you.)


After the exercise he asked for feedback. There were comments like, “it was so beautiful” and “I felt so connected to my partner even though we just met this morning” and so on and so forth.


I’ll tell you what it felt like to me. Totally awkward. Not that the gorgeous women I was paired up with weren’t wonderful human beings with fabulous gifts to give the world. They are! They absolutely are! But I don’t like to gaze into anyone’s eyes for too long. Not even my husband’s! It’s awkward and I find it a bit weird.


No disrespect meant to these women who found it so enlightening and fulfilling. None at all! I just do not relate. And for a brief moment I thought, “what’s wrong with me? Why do I find it the complete opposite of what all these women are saying? What is wrong with me that I would avoid this for the rest of my life if I could?”


Then it occurred to me. NOTHING IS WRONG WITH ME. This just isn’t how I connect to people. I can find this awkward and still respect and bond with those who love this weird, awkward, strange activity. (Much love to all of you who were there!)


So often we look at the world and think, “what’s wrong with me?” I don’t like what it feels like everyone else likes. I don’t lose weight like her. I have zero artistic ability. I can’t…. I don’t… I wish….. If only…..


Please hear this:


You are who you are and who you are is perfect. I don’t mean you have got it all figured out and you do it all right or you’ve got nothing to work on. But you are perfect. Created exactly the right way, with exactly the right temperament, with exactly the right….YOU NAME IT. You are exactly who you were meant to be and it is GOOD.


So when the world around you seems to have it all together or seems to all bond some weird exercise? SHINE ON. You are perfect.


Perfectly Made

Perfectly Made


(And by the way….I think most people don’t have their sh*t together. Even if it looks like they do. They don’t. They just hide it better than some. Most, if not all, of us are bumbling along in one way or another. So quit comparing. Just quit. It does you NO GOOD.)


Much love. xo

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